In my dreams I have....

I've been working on a fun little project. Every morning when I wake up, I jot down any dreams I remember on the notepad I keep by my bed with the title "In my dreams I have...". It's been quite amusing to see what my subconscious entertains me with while I'm sleeping. I have to write it down before I get out of bed, or I forget the details. I also write down where the dream took place if it's somewhere I'm familiar with. It's been interesting to find that so many of my dreams take place in my elementary school. Here's a sampling of my dreams.

In my dreams I have....

Eaten my cell phone.

Breastfed a piglet.

Investigated a crime committed by The Grimace.

Taken a shower in a haunted house.

Renovated said haunted house.

Given birth four times, once to a litter.

Been stalked by a green monster.

Watched as someone robbed my bedroom.

Watched as an airplane exploded and dropped hot glass jars to the ground.

Left my children home alone so I could attend a restaurant where I could cook my own Chinese food.

Missed my exit while driving, so I grabbed both sides of my car out the open windows, picked it up, and turned it around.

Struggled to find a stall with a door in a bathroom filled with dozens of non private toilets.

Moved my bed to the church hallway so I could "listen better".